15 years...

It's been quite a wild ride, being married. There's no manual that would ever be accurate enough to school any of us on what marriage should be... It's trial and error... maturity and wisdom. You don't just come up with wisdom and maturity overnight. I've always been glad that we were married later in our lives. I was 30... he was 25... it was the right time, and I'm glad we met and fell in love when we did.

Marriage is such a roller coaster sometimes. It's great, it's ugly, it's everything in between. Some days those categories happen all at once! I don't envy the young people in this regard, because they have no idea how to be themselves, let alone how to be part of a team. I recommend being at least 28 before you're married. That way, your debts from school are under your belt, your knowledge about how to survive as an independent are under your belt (hopefully), and you're well on your way to being a positive part of society. Young people who marry out of high school or straight out of college haven't got the time in as an individual to be part of a marriage. They're still learning... still growing into who they will become.

We all grow and change throughout life. I've changed over these last 15 years... significantly. I haven't liked who I've become, but have also reveled in what I've gained wisdom and discernment in. The highs and lows always bring wisdom, no matter how high or how low. Being a part of a team brings an aspect of life I hadn't experienced before, since I'd never been part of sports in school. I can say that I've learned more about life from Ben than from any other person beside my mother... and it's been a valuable part of our life together. I think Ben gets a lot out of experiencing life with me as well. I hope so, anyway! We compliment one another. We work hard to fight for each other, in the midst of us giving up on ourselves. Me especially. Ben never gives up - he's a force. He has taught me the value of perspective... The value of perseverance... The value of always seeing yourself as valuable. Those are things I've never seen in myself. I've learned the value of hard work. Ben works very hard, and has brought himself into a new level of success recently. I'm so proud of him. He teaches me every day. I listen to him talk during his conference calls, and he has a way of massaging people to his way of thinking. He's bright, clever, creative, thoughtful, and beautiful. He represents who I've wanted to be all my life.

15 years... it's hard to wrap my head around it. I've changed so much in these years. I've gone through so much in these years. I've struggled so much in these years. I'm a different person, but Ben loves me more today than ever before. Who could ask for more? I've learned a lot in this time... how to love more carefully, not just out of my own mind. I've learned to listen more carefully, so I hear his side and take it seriously. I've also learned about who I am in Christ, and who I can be. I've been a sloth in my faith for quite a while, and sometimes all it takes is a single sermon to bring you back to the place where you want to seek out God more, and want Him in your life more. I can't say I'm a person who keeps things like this in focus - far from it; but I can say that with age comes wisdom, and I'm seeing the value of focusing on my God more and more every day.

Marriage is nothing to take for granted. God ordained it to be a serious part of our adult lives. I have always taken marriage seriously, aside from my failures in the process. Ben has always taken our life seriously, and has been a man who any other man should take lessons from. Faithful, thoughtful, loving, caring, believing... giving, generous, and everything else.

You'd be blessed to have a man like mine. I know I'm blessed! Looking forward to the next 15!