Recently a very special person in my life has suffered a great loss. His life long friend of 40+ years passed away. Both of these men were alcoholics. My loved one got passed his alcoholism and has lived as a recovering alcoholic for several years. His friend, however, was determined to die as an alcoholic. His life was one of struggle and addiction, and not much more. His friend was one of the only people who gave him time and love in his later life.
This man's life was not marked with struggle always. He grew up in a very wealthy family. He seemed to be the black sheep, and was more than once removed from his family both physically and emotionally. As life progressed his parents removed him from their wills, leaving him without much of a legacy from a pronounced family. He was one of 5 siblings, and was the second to pass away, only after his brother who passed from cancer. This man never made much of his life, and was continually burdened by the weight of addiction. My loved one did what he could to support and help him, but to no avail.
As he passed, from alcohol poisoning it turns out... his siblings (parents are both have passed on before) had already removed him from their lives. His one sister stayed in touch with him, but had no need or want of his ashes after he had been cremated. This troubled my loved one, and felt as though he was the only one who truly cared about him. How can a sibling simply ignore and abandon their brother? I know, even as I sit here knowing my brother and I aren't close, that there's nothing that would stop me from giving him an honorable send of, and care about where his final resting place was.
Family has surely been fractured as I've witnessed in my 44 years. Lack of a parent in the household, lack of discipline, and the failure of the family to be a firm foundation for young people have created a true lack and emergency for our social standing. I believe that these things have been critical to the problems that we see in young people today.
It seems as though my stand in life is one that has not been widely accepted in our society. There are many issues that deter the reality of good manners, proper environmental standing, respect of authority, and the willingness to move through the educational system in order to gain ground and find work, especially in our rural community. I'm not sure why so many young people choose this for themselves, but I also see what they choose as the "wide path" in life. The narrow path has long been neglected, and I see it as a very negative aspect of our society today.
The burden of death is part of all of our lives. My loved one's friend chose a lifestyle that would eventually end his life. Indeed it did. His family had long been a fractured institution, and he was unfortunately a result of that. I mourn the loss, for my loved one, and for his family... although I'm afraid his family has no place for mourning in his being gone.
Family is an institution that upholds our society in many ways. We are better when we have family to build our lives on. Please understand that, no matter how troubled your family may be... that it is that relational enhancement to life that can mean all the difference.
