Okay, I'm writing today because I can, and I want to. Bottom line, I like to express myself in word. I'm better at writing than speaking. I've had classes in public speaking, and honestly, it was lost on me. I have friends who feel the same way, but have gone so far as to take classes to further their public speaking savvy. I'm not that gal... I gain a lot from my husband Ben who has become a very skilled professional in the ways of both public speaking and teaching. He could be a wonderful teacher if he wanted to. But, as this is my blog, I'm speaking for myself, and thus choose this medium instead of being out in front of a group who is staring at me, wondering what on earth I just said.
Today I had a situation that made me feel less than comfortable. I don't know if you've ever experienced something that made you feel extremely uneasy, but I did today, and I wanted to share. It wasn't out of the ordinary for me to travel into areas of the county/area that are less than perfect. One might describe them as low brow, back woods, ungodly, or perhaps freakishly out of the ordinary. It wasn't something I expected, because often I travel into these areas that are known as "the sticks." Once I passed the specific address, I turned around, and rolled into the driveway. Some of the people I know would have been severely put out by even venturing into this place, but like I said, it wasn't out of the ordinary for where I travel for work.
The feeling of despair came over me. The visual took me aback. House in disrepair; children in the driveway who seemed unkept, dirty, and poor; trash everywhere. There were stacks of old tires, broken and unused items piling up near the trees/house/garage... and a feeling of overwhelming evil. I was shocked frankly, because I've never experienced this feeling on my routes thus far. It was something new, and I didn't like it at all.
As I stepped out of the car, I noticed an adult who seemed uncomfortable with the sight of a 'stranger.' I tend to walk boldly, and have known that by doing this, you ward off the idea that you're weak and easily overcome. The transaction was not out of the ordinary - familiar enough for me to feel somewhat comfortable standing and waiting for the man to finish writing out a check for me. I walked away feeling as though I shouldn't have my back to this person, as the children suddenly disappeared and I was there alone with this man. I came away with a completely overwhelming feeling of evil. I'm not used to that, and it frightened me.
I know that I represent a Light in these situations, and cling ever so tightly to that reality in times such as this. I hope that my light was evident, but it will always be unknown if it truly was. One thing is for certain - I don't plan on going there ever again. I'm not strong enough to handle whatever was there. I fear for the well being of the children, and the man I interacted with. I have no idea what it was that brought these feelings about, but I know it wasn't good.
I trust in God to preserve my going out and my coming in... it says I can trust Him with that in the Bible. Thank GOD. I'm not one to linger on bad things like this, but I haven't been able to shake the feeling I got while I was there, but I don't intend to keep it with me as I go forward tomorrow during my full day of work, or from here on. I just needed to express it and to warn my readers. Not everywhere you go is safe and comfortable. Not everyone you come into contact with is good and trustworthy. Just be aware of your circumstances and know that the Lord guides you through even the most ugly of situations...
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