When it just needs to be said...

I'm feeling like a rant tonight. I've had some things on my mind that I need to put down. People can be so awful, and there are many - MANY reasons for them to be so. I don't like being awful, but I can be. But what bothers me are things I don't do. I don't verbally berate people. I don't say things that make people feel like less of a human being. I don't turn my nose up at people, especially those who I have known, and who know me. I can't say that I've always been this way - as a young person I know I was a bully at times, and I know I hurt people. I've learned, as I've aged, how to be better than that. I know I'm no better than anyone else, and that each of us have reasons for being who we have become. I'm not who I want to be in every aspect of my life, but I'm a darn good distance from what I was.

Meanwhile, I'm angry and disappointed in people who choose to berate the person they love the most in life (supposedly) based on something they 'believe'... not facts, no. They simply have a 'feeling' based on what they've witnessed that person 'acting like'. That's ridiculous. You haven't had one stitch of proof as to anything you're accusing, yet you still make them feel like they're about to be booted to the curb. What? Really? You're that small minded and insecure about your relationship that you wouldn't give that person the benefit of the doubt? You'd rather accuse them of something ridiculous rather than try to communicate and get to the root of what you think you're seeing? I'm so sorry, but that's just beyond my ability to understand. I don't like what you're doing, and I don't like how you're treating people. I know I don't have any say in your world, but you're wrong.

There have also been recent things that have caused me to reflect back on my high school years, and the people who had been my "friends". I use that term VERY loosely. These people never saw me as a friend - never treated me as a friend - never acted the way real friends would where I was concerned. Meanwhile, we grew up. Or, I should say, some of us did. Most recently there was a death in the family of one of those people, and although she in particular has also grown into an adult, there are several people around her who I can't say that about. Now, I'm only reflecting on past feelings that have never been resolved, but I want to say it anyway. Once and for all. You're not better than me, you're a small minded group of ladies who have always kept the 'I'm better than you' view of others. I hate that about you. You're not better than me. You don't even know me anymore. You have caused me to not want to pay respects to someone who passed, simply because my presence there might bring back the awkward 'you're not wanted here' feelings that have always crept up when I'm around you. Well, I will be paying respect to the person and family, and I will get past my feelings of inadequacy while I'm there. Whatever you feel you need to do while I'm there is fine. I have broad shoulders... I can handle it. Meanwhile, I often think of you and hope that sooner or later you'll break free of your juvenile attitudes and become the adults you were meant to be. Being ugly toward people is just a sad reality that I don't have to be a part of. I can only control myself, but when I haven't, I've apologized. You, on the other hand, can eat it. I don't care what you think anymore.

Now I know Jesus isn't in these rantings of mine. Frankly there are moments when the garbage in life just boils over and I have to say something for my own well being. This is it. You don't have to read it, and you certainly don't have to like it. It's mine, and I own it. As for you, all of you, grow up.

True Friends...

There are plenty of people in our lives who we consider 'friends' or 'acquaintances', but those who we consider 'true friends' are far and above the most valuable, wouldn't you say? True friends are those people who we speak to from the heart... who we trust with our deepest secrets, and our most treasured hopes and dreams. We have an unparalleled love for these sacred few in our lives... and well we should.

You can have as many people in your life as possible, but those treasured few are the ones who really matter the most. There may be connections who we can network with and gain social and career goals with, but there are a few who hold our heart in their hands. Those precious few who know us for who we truly are, and love us anyway. It may be a parent, a grade school or high school classmate, college, work, church... each of them hold a special place, and a life long connection.

Occasionally remind yourself of the people who truly matter to you. Those who you can tell anything, and they won't judge. The friends who you can always turn to for guidance, a healing word, a laugh. They're the important parts of life that you just can't replace.

This is a verbal hug for someone special to me, who I've known for decades, but who only recently called me a true friend. That by far means more to me than can be expressed in words.

Spend your time dwelling on things and people who really matter. The rest is just life in its all-consuming daily droning. Refresh your mind with the love of your true friends!